It's Been a Year and I am... Still Alive

I never thought I’d be celebrating this, but happy birthday to my blog!!

It’s been a whole year since I've been There and Back Again. An entire year of my favorite recipes shared, my dry humor documented, science dropped, and bad jokes shoved in your face. A lot has happened in my life since I started this little endeavor. Too many things to list here, but the 2 biggest blessings are the new home my wife and I moved into and the new baby that is on an express train, due to arrive in a few short months. It doesn't take a lot to make me happy, but thinking about those two things puts a smile on my face on the cloudiest of days. Coupled with Seb and his fast growing, turning from a crawling baby to a nonstop toddler before my eyes, all make for one happy, happy man.

Judging by my numbers that I may or may not check more often than I would care to admit, it would appear the same people check my posts out regularly. To those of you that do, and you know who you are, I humbly thank you for taking your time to at least open the page. I surprisingly have a few posts that have some fairly high numbers for me, so the internet is doing something right in my favor. So to everyone else who has ever checked out my stuff – thank you. Yes, you’re special to me too.

While doing this for a year I've learned things I didn't know before. My standard that I gave myself sometimes forced me to look into why a certain process works and another doesn't or why something is named what it was named. I’m glad I gave myself that challenge for not only my education, but for you, my reader. From day 1 I knew I wanted people to walk away with something more than a recipe. I always tried to teach you the things I’ve learned in my career, and in my research. And more importantly, I always tried to talk you through the recipe rather than instruct you. My blog may not have a straightforward, traditional recipe card that’s easily printable, but I don’t think I’ll ever change my format from how I’m doing it now. Yeah, I talk a lot and I tend to ramble (like I’m doing right now), but that’s just the way I am.

…Because I have no one to talk for the better part of my days other than my kid and my dog.

As far as how the blog is doing, I’m happy with it. While it’s great knowing I’m getting my thoughts and recipes out there, I’m doing this for me just as much as I’m doing it for those that follow it. I looked back at my earlier posts and comparing them to what I’ve done lately, all I could think was… Holy crap, I put some terrible pictures on here! …Yeah, that’s pretty much all I could gather from any of it, they’re that terrible. I think I’m going to follow Jenn Bauguss’s advice and redo some pictures when I get the chance. I already started with my first post which was about Pancakes. When I started the blog we were living in an apartment and the kitchen got as much light as a dungeon. So now that I have a lot more natural light to play with I’m glad I can do better with less editing.

Oh, what? The pancake post doesn't have updated pictures you say? Hmm, that’s weird.

Oh! I know why… That’s because it’s actually here on this pancake post over at TheManTheChefTheDad.wordpress.com.

And there we have my gift to the blog: A makeover and a new home. Blogger has been good to me with no issues really. I just wanted to update the look and feel of everything and I felt like WordPress had more options for me as far as new looks go. So far, I am happy with the decision. I wasn't at first, heck, I quit WordPress at least twice before I finally grit my teeth and tried to make it work. It took some time to get it up to snuff, which explains where I've been since my last post on Valentine’s Day, but there is still plenty of work to be done. It’s at about 80% from where I want it to be, and 80% is good enough to unveil it for the birthday bash. Once everyone has transitioned I’ll eventually phase out this Blogger version of the blog. Yes, it will be a sad day but it’s a by-product of progression.

If you'd like an official welcome to my new home, check it out over at its Introductory Post.

I guess that’s that for now. I have a lot of things that I want to eventually do so I hope everyone is excited. I know I’m excited. Getting the WordPress site up and running has been crazy fun and it sparked a fire back in me for not only blogging regularly but for cooking. I've had the urge to do a lot of stuff just to blog it. Hell, I even bought dishes that don’t match for the sole purpose of picture taking! That’s gotta be one of the final steps in becoming a full on food blogger.

I already said it, but I’ll say it again… Thank you to everyone who has supported me throughout my 1^st year. Kind words and simple acknowledgement mean more than anyone could understand. I hope everyone who visits here is entertained and finds what they’re looking for even though they may not have known they were looking for it. 

Ask Not What Your Pantry Can Do For You...

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Even the most resourceful housewife cannot create miracles from a rice less pantry.

                                                    

                               ~ Chinese Proverb

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Unfortunately, not my pantry :-(

If cooking a meal was a war, the pantry would be your armory.

And if you want to win that war, it has to be stocked and loaded with everything you need.

Ok, maybe not everything you need, that would probably require the space of a garage. And if you’re like me, chances are you don’t even have an actual “pantry” to put anything in, just a few cabinets. Cabinet or closet sized, it doesn’t matter, your pantry is your pantry.

When stocking and maintaining your pantry you have to keep in mind what you and whoever you’re cooking for enjoy to eat. You don’t want to stock up on soy sauce if you’re not fond of Chinese food. But if you love Italian, you’ll want to keep dry pasta and tomato sauce on hand all the time. It sounds like common sense, but I've seen plenty a pantry that was stocked with non-essential junk. Your pantry is more than just a place to keep your condiments and canned food.

If you know me, you know I’m always making stuff like brownies, cookies, cakes, breads, all sorts of different things. But I don’t go out and buy different ingredients every time I want to make something. For the most part, everything I need to cook or bake at my hearts content, uses stuff that I already have on hand. And like I said, I don’t have a closet sized pantry; I’m working out of cabinets. Two to be exact. If you keep a few basic staples in your pantry, you will be shocked at how many different things you can make. If you have a somewhat decent array of items, and want to make something but you’re missing an ingredient, just find a similar recipe that doesn’t need that certain thing you don’t have.

Or if it’s something that isn’t integral to the recipe (like eggs to a cheesecake batter), just replace it with something similar you do have.

Or, *gasp*, omit it altogether! I’m a rebel in kitchen, I know what I can and can’t get by without. Mastering your ingredients means you'll learn which corners to cut and when. If I don’t have one ingredient, I’m not going to let it stop me from making what I want to make. And you know what; I’m not going to lose any sleep over it either.

If you're reading between the lines, you now know you should stock your pantry with a crap load of improvisation as well.

So, in case you’re the type that has to be told what exactly you should have, you’re in luck:

Things like Spices and Oils (Extra Virgin for drizzling as a final touch on salads or meats and for pan searing, Vegetable or Canola for everything else) should always be stocked since they’re so integral to cooking.

A lot of people don't really care for or even look at Extra Virgin Olive Oil because of the price. With the $8-$10 bottle you see at the supermarket I can understand, and agree, why it seems expensive for a small bottle of oil, especially if you can get a few bigger bottles of another type of oil for the same price. But if you're using it correctly, and utilizing its unique flavor, then you'll learn very quickly that spending that much on a bottle of oil is a bargain. There are some nutjobs foodies out there who will gladly pay upwards of $50-$75 for a bottle of authentic, Italian Extra Virgin Olive Oil, and others who will live their lives perfectly content and not give a vinaigrette about how virgin their oil is. I would love to try a good oil like that, but I don't think the wife would go with having oil for dinner all week.


If you want to get schooled a little bit more on why Extra Virgin Olive Oil is so important, check out This site and This site. Also, if you're feeling like you want to check out the hype and try out this liquid gold from the supermarket, here is a good list of what to try and what to avoid, from Cook's Illustrated.


Next are preference items like a few boxes of different Dried Pasta with a jar or two of your favorite Tomato Sauce, you can even use Canned Tomatoes since those are handy to keep around, not to mention you get to flavor your sauce the way you want (which is the way I recommend going). Soy and Worcestershire (or as I like to call it, Wushtisharar) Sauces are nice to keep for flavoring and marinades. Red Wine Vinegar is good, or my favorite that I always keep a bottle of and that you can never go wrong with, Balsamic Vinegar.

Let me say that again... You can Never. Go wrong with. Balsamic Vinegar. I'd say it again, but I'm sure you get it. I can't really explain it, but Balsamic Vinegar is one of those things that you just need. And like Extra Virgin Olive Oil, you get what you pay for. You can go with a cheap supermarket bottle and be fine, or you can spend upwards of $50-$500 for a real bottle of Balsamic Vinegar that was aged from 20 all the way up to 150 years. Balsamic is to be treated like wine - Always remember - the older the better. Paired with Extra Virgin Olive Oil and maybe a little Parmesan cheese, Balsamic Vinegar is perfect for dipping a fresh, crusty bread in. And by perfect, I mean I'll be happy eating that everyday for the rest of my life. Also great for salads and drizzling on steak after reducing it to a thick sauce, Balsamic Vinegar is worth an investment. 


For a little crash course on Balsamic Vinegar, how it's made and what to look for when buying it, check This site out.


Moving on, Chicken or Beef Stock, the kind with lesser sodium, for a quick soup or sauce. Bread Crumbs for… breading.. stuff. You can go with regular or Panko bread crumbs for an extra crunch. Rice is always good to have on hand if you like it, and honestly who doesn’t like rice? It's cheap, crazy versatile and can feed a lot. A bag each of Potatoes and Onions goes a long way, potatoes can be made a hundred ways and onions can flavor everything. And Corn Starch because you’ll never know when you have to thicken something up.

Now, if you plan on baking a lot, I hope you’re ready for a whole other list of things you should have:

Flour is a necessity. I use all purpose because it’s fairly all purpose, and it’s not just for baking either. Flour can be used to thicken (as part of a roux, but that’s another post), to coat stuff for frying, as well as other things. So yeah, flour is important. There are a bunch of other types of flour you can buy but only buy them if you really need them. Like for self-rising flour, all you need to do is add some baking powder and salt to all-purpose flour and BAM, it's self-rising. You're welcome.

Sugar in all its forms – white, brown and powdered – should be on hand. I also keep a container of Turbinado (Raw) Sugar because it is amazing for topping off cookies or cakes. Baking Soda and Baking Powder are also important staples along with a good Pure Vanilla Extract, not that imitation crap. Imitation vanilla extract is for the people who buy already ground nutmeg, and don't get me started on that.

Then the extras like a bag or two of (preferably semi-sweet because it's more versatile) Chocolate Chips and bars of Baking Chocolate for more rustic chunks, shavings, and duh - baking. Cocoa Powder, a can or bag of your favorite type of Nut or Nut Mix, and some Yeast if you plan on making bread a lot. Also, I have a new obsession that I think I'll keep around regularly and that's Marshmallow Fluff. Holy crap, it's like magic in a jar. And if I have to tell you to stock Peanut Butter, then you need more help than what I can give you.

Keep in mind that there are plenty of other things you can stock your pantry with; these are just my suggestions because I’m a simple man. I don’t like to get all complicated with things like meringue powder, gelatin, or cream of tartar. I tip my hat to you if you use them frequently, I just don't.

Also keep in mind that your pantry isn’t the only thing that needs maintaining. There are necessities that need to stay stocked in your fridge and freezer as well:

Eggs and Butter are on the top of that list, doesn’t matter if you’re not a fan of eggs for breakfast or buttered toast, those two things are used in a ridiculous amount of recipes. Then there’s Garlic. I buy peeled cloves by the container and then set like 20 of them aside in a airtight container and I put them in the produce drawer in the fridge, just in case I need to make roasted garlic or something. The rest of it, I throw in my food processor and chop it all up and then off it goes to my freezer. It may take away the whole “fresh garlic” aspect of it, but it works for me since I hate to peel my own garlic and it won’t go bad. Also in my cooler you’ll find Milk and most of the time Heavy Cream, which is also a necessity if you’re going to be making sauces or desserts. And cheese. If it were up to me, I’d have at least 5 different types of cheese stocked at all times. But it’s not up to me, so it’s only what we use for sandwiches, usually Sliced American or Cheddar, and Grated Parmesan. If you can though, it’s good to have Cream Cheese, some form of Mozzarella whether it is fresh or shredded, and another type of shredded cheese for the emergency cheese sauce.

In the freezer is obviously where you’ll keep the good stuff. Meats, fish, whatever protein you’re using. For us, there are always, ALWAYS, Chicken Breasts and Ground Beef in the freezer. Off the top of my head I can tell you at least 15 different things you can do with both of those. Also in there are Italian Sausage, some type or a few types of pork, whether it be Pork Chops, Tenderloin or God's gift to mankind, Bacon. Then some form of steak, our favorite being Flank Steak or New York Strip. Other types of meats can be bought periodically for special dinners, like Pork Shoulder, Rib Roast, or Rack of Lamb. But for the most part, what we keep in our freezer gets used on a weekly basis. And that’s what you’re aiming for. Also in the freezer are frozen vegetables like Broccoli Florets, Corn, or Vegetable Medley that can be quickly utilized for a side dish. I go frozen against fresh because I like to know I have stuff that won’t go bad if I don’t feel like having vegetables that day. Or week. Or month. Ok, let me not sound like I don’t like vegetables because I am an absolute sucker for sautéed Broccoli with butter and garlic. The rest of the things you keep in your freezer and fridge are based on preference. Well, I guess it's all based on your preference, haha. It’s good to have some ready-to-go type of bread in the freezer, like a Baguette or Dinner Rolls for a quick garlic bread or steak sandwich.

Salad greens and fresh vegetables are great for quick and easy salads, but we don’t usually go that route over here since the “two sides and a meat” is good enough for us. Also, stuff to keep around if you like them are things like Sour Cream and mayonnaise. Sour Cream is fairly versatile and can be used for sauces or desserts, and mayonnaise is… Well, it’s mayonnaise. There are very few things I hate in this world, but mayonnaise has been on the very top of that list next to war and Will Ferrell movies for a very, very long time. If I make my own mayonnaise, I can tolerate it, but that’s where our relationship ends. Notice how it doesn't even get bold lettering or capitalization. mayonnaise does not deserve to stand out.

Other obvious things you want to keep stocked are Non-Stick Cooking Spray, Parchment Paper, Aluminum Foil, Plastic Wrap, etc...

And last but not least: The Wine, Rum, Liqueur and Brandy. For cooking purposes of course. When it comes to wine, always remember to use something that you wouldn't mind drinking. If you use a cheap wine that you don't like, chances are it's not going to make your sauce taste any better. I wouldn't worry about going all out either, I use a $10 bottle that I have no problems with. For a White Wine, it's safe to go with a Chardonnay, and Red, a Merlot. With Rum, if a recipe calls for it, it's most likely a Dark Rum, so use your favorite. There are plenty of Liqueur's to choose from, but I always have a bottle of Grand Marnier, can't go wrong with that. And my mother swears by her favorite Brandy for baking, Felipe II.

That should about cover it. I know it sounds like a lot, but once you have it all, it’s about maintaining it. And like I said, everything is based on your preference. It’s about what you like and what you use. In the end, I hope I gave you some ideas as to what you should essentially need and that this gave you some insight as to what things should be kept. I know most of you are probably reading, thinking to yourself, "duh, I knew all this." Well, amazingly, there are a bunch of people out there who don't know a whisk from a spatula, people who stock nothing but boxed "food" to cook dinner with. If you want to make something spontaneously, then the more things you have on hand, the better luck you have at successfully making it. Like I said, that’s common sense.

.. Of Spices

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Once you get a spice in your home, you have it forever. Women never throw out spices. The Egyptians were buried with their spices. I know which one I'm taking with me when I go.

                                                             ~ Erma Bombeck

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Imagine...

You've cooked the perfect steak. Charred on the outside, nice juicy and pink (or red if you like it still mooing) on the inside. You start salivating and you're so excited you totally miss your mouth and shove the fork into your bottom lip.

I know, I've been there.

Finally, bottom lip out of the way and you start to chew.

And chew. And chew.

And then it hits you, you're not really tasting anything. You look around the table and your significant other/company is sitting there, smiling, saying, ”Mmmmmmm..”

But you know the truth.

You didn't season it enough. Or maybe even not at all. So do your dinnermates a favor and walk out of the room for a second so they could quickly grab the table salt when you're not looking. It's the least you could do for giving them bland, flavorless meat.

Ok, smarty pants, yeah I know you taste the meat. But you are missing out. Let me put it like this:

Not using spices, herbs or any other seasonings on what needs it, is like watching the Superbowl on a standard definition tv. It's fuzzy, snowy, color is all wrong, it's terrible. Yeah, you're watching the Superbowl, but it's not memorable. When it's over, you're not thinking, ”wow, that looked great!”

Now, if you are using seasonings, you're watching the Superbowl in high definition! Everything is crisp, sharp and definitive. You could see the individual beads of sweat on players faces and the grass is so green it's making your eyes bleed. It's the power of high definition exploding in your eyes the way the power of spices explodes in your mouth.

As I said, sprinkling salt on your bland steak while it's on the plate would help a lot, and in this case it's all you can do. But you, the preparer of this meal, are responsible of taking care of the seasoning in the cooking process, not at the table with your guests or family. As a cook, it's embarrassing; you should be on top of things. When you watch someone take a bite and then quickly grab the salt shaker or a bottle of steak sauce, it hurts. They may as well be slapping you in the face. I believe what I was taught, and what I was taught is that if you season and cook anything correctly, then you don't need salt or steak sauce at the dinner table.

But worry not, it can all be avoided. You can go from being secretly ridiculed and unknowingly slapped in the face, to being publicly praised, loved by millions, kissed by strangers, handed first borns for blessings, and asked to autograph body parts. You just have to know what you’re doing.

Spices are integral to everyday cooking. And when I say spices, I mean anything you’ll be using to season with. Which includes but is not limited to fresh/dried herbs, the numerous types of salts, and actual spices, all of which are totally different, and all are better for different things.

But I’m sure you already knew that. I’m glad that you… wait, what? You just use the pre made seasonings that you buy at a store? Really?? Well, I guess that's ok. I mean, if you like having someone else tell you how to season steak or chicken, who am I to judge? At least you're using something.

But just in case you're curious, let me give you a crash course on what you should know:

Fresh/Dried Herbs:


There are a bunch (haha, herb humor) of different herbs you can cook with, almost all of which can be either fresh or dried. I always prefer fresh because, well, it’s fresh. But since I don’t have anywhere to keep an herb garden and I’m not about to spend over $100 at Bed Bath and Beyond for an indoor one, I’ve learned to live with dried herbs. The money you spend for fresh herbs in your local supermarket isn't worth the amount of use you get out of them. I love fresh herbs, and will wind up buying those 4 sprigs of Rosemary for $5 if I absolutely have to, but I'm perfectly fine working with dried. Dried is the way to go if you want to get the most out of your money. There is nothing wrong with them, they last a lot longer than fresh ones, but they do lose their punch after a while. If you buy a new jar of dried oregano and open it up the aroma is going to hit you and the taste is going to hit you harder. But let’s say you buy a spice rack and it comes with all these crazy exotic spices and dried herbs you can’t pronounce let alone ever heard of, chances are they’re not going to give you much flavor unless you use a lot. You don’t know how long they’ve been sitting in that box, which is why it’s always safer to just toss the contents and refill the containers with freshly bought replacements. Trust me, it’s worth the investment.

Personally, my favorites to keep stocked up are Oregano, Thyme, and Rosemary. They’re all great for sauces and soups, I love Thyme on a steak or pork, and you can’t beat Rosemary on chicken. Others that can be used frequently are Sage if you make sauces and cook a lot of chicken or italian and Tarragon which goes well with fish.

A few things to keep in mind: Dried herbs are, for a good part of their shelf life, 3 times stronger than their fresh counterparts. So don’t go substituting the same amount of dried Thyme for fresh Thyme. Like I said, when you first open up a container of anything dried, it is at its strongest, and if it’s been sitting in your cabinet since the Thanksgiving before, it won’t be as strong, so take that into consideration as well. Another good tip when using dried herbs is to squeeze and crush whatever you're using between your fingers as you add them to a recipe. This will give them a little boost as all the oils that are being kept inside are rubbed out. Plus it makes your fingers smell fantastic.

There are also powdered herbs, but ever since a freak accident involving powdered Thyme, a sauce, and a very confused friend named Rick I gave a recipe to, I have vowed to stay away from such things and so should you! I'm sure he has.

Spices:


Spices are far less complicated. They’re simple, straight forward, and to the point. You either like them or you don’t. There are no fresh alternatives to consider, unless you would want to grind your own spices. If so, get yourself a brand new coffee grinder and go nuts. I’d love to buy spices to grind them up myself; you can imagine the freshness you’ll get versus that of buying in a jar. But when it comes down to it, I guess I’m just too lazy. Anyways, different spices have different uses, like sweet and savory for example. And just like herbs, they’re going to add another level of depth to whatever you’re preparing. Also like herbs, there are a whole lot of them that may be great, but you won’t really need them in everyday cooking. Like Cardamom. If you’re not a big spice person or familiar with Indian cultures, you probably just said, “Carda-wha?” Well, Cardamom is a key ingredient in Indian spice blends and is used for flavoring cakes, cookies, fish, whatever. But how many recipes have you come across that call for Cardamom? Yeah, I’d say that number is pretty close to zero. Heck I’m a Chef and I can’t recall ever using Cardamom. What about Juniper Berries? Star Anise? Yeah… The point is that there are a crazy amount of spices out there, and they are all great, unique and amazing when utilized, but for everyday tasks you don’t need to have a huge spice rack, just a few essentials.

I have a few spices that I try to always keep on hand: Garlic, Cumin, Curry and Chili Powders. Cayenne Pepper and Red Pepper Flakes. And Whole Black Peppercorns or Peppercorn Medley, which are housed inside of a pepper grinder.

Did you hear me? Pepper... Grinder. If you don't have one, get one. If you buy already ground pepper, please stop torturing your body and family. The difference between freshly ground and already ground is the same difference between Alfredo Sauce and white paint. Black pepper is the world's most traded spice and is used for not only flavoring but for beauty products and medicine as well. So treat it with a little respect.

White Pepper on the other hand can be treated like a red headed step child. That stuff is for sissy’s who don’t like black specs in their white sauces or mashed potatoes.


Onion Powder is another popular one but I can live without it.

Also, the sweet spices shall not go unsung: Whole Nutmeg. If you’re going to go with Nutmeg, don’t buy powdered/ground! You may as well be using sawdust. Whole Nutmeg when grated fresh using a micro grater, will bring out everything Nutmeg is supposed to be. The powdered stuff should be avoided at all cost. Then there’s Ginger, which is versatile and can be used for savory dished as well, and my favorite spice in the whole wide world: Cinnamon. If I could get away with putting Cinnamon in everything, I totally would. And I mean everything.

I'd wear cinnamon deodorant.

That's how serious I am.

Then there are the popular spice blends of Pumpkin Pie Spice and All Spice. You hear of these a lot during the holidays and are just mixes of 4 or 5 different spices.

My little spice mix and kosher salt for easy seasoning

Salt:


Salt is the most important of all seasonings. It should be placed on the highest pedestal when cooking. It will be the main factor in your dish’s success. If you do not know this, then you need to listen up, because if something is wrong and things just don’t taste right, it’s probably because you didn’t use salt.

I remember one of my first classes in culinary school, we were flavoring a soup and we needed to add salt. We new students to all things culinary did not know the importance of it, so we only added little dashes thinking it was ok. Shocked and surprised that our instructor kept telling us to add more salt, we’d add a few more pinches, and still going off her initial tasting, she knew it was not enough. We could’ve sworn that soup was going to be as salty as the sea, but sure enough, it was perfect. And thus was my first lesson: Salt makes a difference.

Salt should be looked at as a flavor enhancer. If something is bland, you add salt and it makes the flavor pop out. It’s a cook’s “Plan A”. It should always be the first thing you season with, sometimes, it’s all you need. Once again, if you don’t know this, and you have problems with the way things turn out in the kitchen, now you know why. In case you didn’t know, there are a whole bunch of different types you can get a hold of, all with different flavors. These are the three main types of salt you'd find in a store:

Table – Is the most common, at least it was when I was growing up. If you look very close, they are perfect little cubes. Why cubes? That’s science. Table salt is favored by bakers because it dissolves the easiest. Also it's in the same family is iodized salt which is basically regular table salt fortified with traces of iodine to prevent iodine deficiency, which can lead to quite a few problems.

Kosher – Is the most commonly used in professional kitchens. Because of its flaky texture, it sticks to what you are using it on rather than bouncing off like table salt would due to its cube shape. It’s the salt that I use daily because it’s what I was taught with and it’s what I like. It’s a little milder than table salt and it doesn’t have any kind of additives so it’s the purest you could use.

Sea – Is the most expensive because it is, shockingly, derived directly from the sea. Sea salt is very unique due to the process of obtaining it, not to mention it is unrefined so you’re not only getting actual salt, you’re also getting a few natural minerals thanks to the sea it came from. I love to use coarse sea salt on a nice steak once it’s done cooking since the cooking process kind of strips the unique flavor away.

Whichever one you care to use, just remember, salt is your friend!


Now that you’re a little caught up and have a better understanding of what you should have at hand and what they're used for, I hope you use the knowledge wisely. Honestly, if you only use those pre made seasoning mixes, you’re stuck in a box. Things like Old Bay (which is great for seafood) are ok. What I’m talking about is the stuff that comes in the bottles marked “Steak Seasoning” or “Chicken Seasoning”. Those things are stopping your curious mind from being free and experimental! Not to mention they contain additives to keep it fresh or from clumping up. Get rid of them! Start fresh, start new, learn what you like and what you don’t. You might hate Thyme, but adore Tarragon; think Cumin smells like feet (like my wife swears it does), but love Star Anise and use it in everything. Once you have an idea of what you like, you could start making your own seasoning mixes, taking advantage of every flavor you can because knowing what you're using and what it does to everything makes seasoning a whole lot easier.

I hope this helped. If I get enough questions I'll post about spices again. But for now, I'm out of thyme.

Oh come on, I know you at least smiled at that one!

I Can Cook & So Can You!

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Cookery is not chemistry. It is an art. It requires instinct and taste rather than exact measurements.

                                 ~ Marcel Boulestin
                                                        

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There are hundreds, if not thousands of secrets in the culinary world. If you were to lay down all of the secrets side by side, it would create a chain that could go around Earth twice. …Or something like that. These secrets are not guarded by a government agency dedicated to protecting kitchen techniques or recipes. They’re not on a need-to-know basis, nor are they illegal. Honestly, they’re not even secrets; they're things you haven't learned yet even though they're staring you right in the face. It’s the things the average person shrugs off while thinking, “This tastes so good. I’ll never be able to make something like this.” Or, “That Chef has trained for years in far off lands where people pray to cookbooks and children are taught knife skills before the alphabet.” 


Look, whether you believe me or not, cooking is simple. There is no formula to memorize, there’s no school you have to go to in order to be a great Chef (don’t get me started), and there are no secrets to making something extraordinary. All it takes is the will to learn. With that will, and a little time, you’ll find out that not only is cooking easy, but that for all these years, you’ve been paying hard earned money on meals you thought you couldn’t do at home.

The way I see it, everyone is equal. The hard working mom who cooks every night for her family can probably make a dish 10 times better than any celebrity Chef, especially King D-Bag, Guy Fieri. Seriously, if you don't know who that is, look up Tool in urban dictionary and I'll be surprised if you don't see his picture. If you're really in the dark, you can just scroll through Food Network Humor to get an idea (but not literally in the dark, he gives nightmares). What I’m saying is there are people who can create something amazing and unique, but that doesn’t mean they’re Culinary Gods and we should kiss the ground they walk on or watch their cooking shows and buy their ridiculously overpriced cookware. It just means they’ve been cooking for a long time and stuck with it. With the will and time, you can cook like a professional. Add the dedication and passion, and you can actually be a professional. Throw in the some hair dye, sunglasses with flames on them and a sports car that screams, “I’m a huge poser with a small penis”, and you can even be Guy Fieri.

When I went to culinary school (again – you really do not want to hear me talk about culinary school) I had no idea what I was doing. But I knew I needed a career so I learned everything I could. And when I got out of school, I started working as a slave cook in a hotel. Even though it only took me 1 day to realize I made a horrible mistake, I never stopped learning. Fast forward to today, and I’m still learning, always keeping an ear and eye out to what’s new and what looks good. With my “always learning” mentality, I’ve picked up countless techniques and recipes throughout my 10 years of being in the hospitality industry. I’ve learned secrets, debunked myths, and discovered hidden strengths and weaknesses. I’ve created dishes, wrote menus, and plated masterpieces. I’ve trained, managed and supervised entire kitchens. But on the other hand, I’ve also burned a lot of shit. I’ve overcooked, over seasoned, and over compensated. I've made plenty of messes, ruined pots and knives and broke equipment. I lost count of how many stitches I had to get, but I do know I have more scars from burns than I do knives. I could go on but I'll save myself the embarrassment since my list of mess ups outweigh the good.

The point I'm trying to make is simple: We all start somewhere. And no matter how long we’ve been at it, we all make mistakes and that shouldn't deter you from trying to cook something. I hear all too often that a recipe is beyond someone’s experience, and it irks me. Not because that person doesn’t have any faith in themselves, it doesn’t matter to me if you don’t believe in yourself, I won’t lose sleep over it. What gets to me is that cooking is so damn easy. Trust me, I’m not saying that because I went to culinary school (I know, a culinary school post is inevitable), I’m saying that because it’s the truth. This isn't science, recipes are not carved in stone, they're guidelines. There was not one job I had that I couldn’t find some guy off the street with no cooking experience whatsoever, and train him to work the line in less than a week.

Cooking has this rep that makes people believe it can only be accomplished by studying for years and working 7 days a week in a busy kitchen. But like I said, if you have the will and the time, that’s half the battle. If you get acquainted with as many ingredients as you can, know your spices, basic techniques and a few do’s and don’t's, then you’re set and ready to conquer the culinary world.

Just don’t try and conquer it with a soufflé. They make terrible ammunition and the only thing they will kill is your confidence.


Note: I am in no way, shape or form, attempting to talk you into, or saying it is ok to pursue a job in the restaurant industry. I'm saying it's ok to try to cook at home. Cooking at home and cooking professionally are two totally different things. It's like comparing relaxing in a pool on a lounge float while sipping a strawberry daiquiri vs. struggling on a life preserver in the middle of the ocean with a dozen hungry sharks circling you. Big difference. So don't do it. The same goes for culinary school. If you really want to study the Culinary Arts, give me $30,000 and I'll teach you everything they taught me, only better, plus I'll give you my degree.

There and Back Again...

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If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world. 

                           ~ J. R. R. Tolkien

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If you know me and you're keeping count, this would be my third attempt at blogging. I say that because I don't want to scare any new followers into thinking something terrible happened if I don't update this, when in reality, I'm just unbelievably lazy. To those who are new, I welcome you. To the returning, thanks for coming back. Again.

My first food blog, Fork Off, was me wanting to get not only recipes, but my experiences as a disgruntled kitchen slave out to the masses (masses, of course, referring to probably 7 people from twitter). But during this endeavor, I was working a full time job in a restaurant as said kitchen slave, and I just wasn't up to spending the short amount of free time I had blogging about the food was the bane of my life a few hours prior. So sadly, as awesome of a name Fork Off was, it was dead on arrival.

Then came my poetry blog where I tapped into my high school self and tried to bring a level of romance and passion to the internet that didn't involve lotion or tissues. Unfortunately, even though it was easy to copy and paste from my typed up works or post videos of my favorite poets, I succumbed to my laziness and just gave up. I always felt poetry was an art, and like any art, it had an audience that loved it and everyone else who didn't care if it existed or not. So just like high school, I decided to stop pretending people cared about poetry. I might go back one day though. Everyone has a little hopeless romantic in them.

And now here we are. Coming up on 2 years of being unemployed. My wife, a Registered Nurse, is making just enough to support us comfortably. So the added stress that was put on our relationship by me working ungodly hours of the night turned out to not be worth it. More importantly, our little man, Sebastian, needed to be taken care of. And if I were to get a job, the common salary of a cook would've been just enough or less than the cost of daycare or a sitter. So it only made sense...

I'm not starting this because I have oodles of time to kill since I'm unemployed. If you don't have a kid, let me just say that it is quite the job taking care of one. Add on keeping up with house work and cooking meals, and I'm lucky to scratch an itch during the day. No, I'm doing this blog because I wanted to keep in touch with what I know. And as much as I hate it as a profession, I know cooking. I know the kitchen, the tools and the trade. I am the product of an overpaid education that vomited me into an underpaid career. But don't get me wrong, as I've said before, I'm not God's gift to foods blogs or cooking, I just want to have an outlet to pour what I know into it. Since my first day on the job some 9 or 10 years ago, I hated the restaurant industry. Fast forward to now and I still do. I hate everything it does, and the way it does it. But when I'm home and I'm cooking a meal for my family, that's where my passion comes out.

That's where it matters.

Not in some trendy restaurant or a fancy plated dessert.

Home is where the heart is.

So now that you know me a little better I hope you enjoy what I do here. Hell, I hope I keep up with it this time. You can look forward to recipes and stories of why restaurants are evil, all with heavy doses of my comforting snarky demeanor that only a cook can bring to you. I may even throw in some life lessons and tidbits I pick up along the way.

Here's to hoping its all worth reading.